'Chocolate' River Taxi

Well, i finally made it out of khao san road and did something cultured. It's hard work getting off of khao san road tho... it's like a lovely, timeless, alcohol-induced cocoon which provides for your every need (cheap food and drink, cheap wares, just released films every night, strange people to look at - i love watching freaks! pool tables, irish bar, live music, clubs, swimming pool, etc etc). And my accomodation is forcing me to meet people at the moment cos my room is so depressing i am literally only there to sleep, wash and change. This is because it's under 2 quid a night, but still. The fan above the bed (can't afford air con) is humongous, and whilst it does move the hot air around the room effectively, it also sounds a lot like a helicopter coming in to land. The 'bed' is the hardest thing i've ever laid on (apart from that time i laid on a plank of wood) it's like a proper bed and everything but they've stinged on the mattress, and it's like really thin, but that's nowt compared to the "pillow", i hesitate to use this word as it conjures images of soft, fluffy head rests, and this it ain't. Oh my god, and the other day, there was a COCKROACH in the shower with me!! E - A - U!! that's like, one of my worst nightmares, along with being chased by a bear (obviously) or swimming with a tiger. So i aimed the shower head and flushed it down the sink but couldn't remember if they could swim either so freaked out about it climbing back up the sink and chasing me round, so the shower ended early and i went back to my room and sat there shaking. I must learn by heart which creatures are able to swim and which are not.

Anywhoo, i broke the khao san hold and caught the river taxi to jim thompson's house (an old bloke that collected thai art that went missing in the cameron islands) and the river taxi there was WAY cooler than some old blokes house! the house was ok, lots of very old asian pottery and thai art work, and the house itself was beautiful, but the river taxi rocks! it's like a big long boat that holds loads of people, and it's 6 baht to get on (70 baht to the pound), you just jump on as it skids (or whatever the aquatic equivalent of skidding is) to the pier before it buggers off again cos they don't hang around the drivers. At first, the river looks all calm and serene, like that one off charlie and the chocolate factory, but when you see the crap floating on it you realise it's probably not that colour cos it's made of chocolate, but more likely a typhoid riddled, rat infested, death pool. The driver of the taxi isn't too cautious or delicate with his boat handling either, but the water's flat at first so it doesn't matter, but as soon as another taxi speeds past, that's it, choppier than a very rough storm out on the Race off of portland bill. And this manky disease ridden water goes everywhere! i don't think any got on my face cos i think it would have melted the skin and i would have noticed, but i won't be sure till i see a mirror tonight.

(NB ... this is maybe an over-reaction cos i did see little kids swimming in it, but i'm SURE they shouldn't have been, it's dis-gus-ting, maybe over time they've become inmmune to cholera, typhoid, rabies, malaria, anaemia, and japanese encephalitis, and maybe they ike swimming in poo and old coke cans, who can say?)