Scoreggia, scoreggia!

By the way, Hannah pointed out that now it sounds like I have a rash on my arse, but I just want to point out that I don't, I've just been reading some of the other blogs and this seems a common theme for bloggation so I thought I'd use it as an example, it's extremely common to tell people about your ailments and what the doctor has prescribed for them on these bloggers.... what - the - fuck?? Why in the name of Great Odin's raven would you post such details on the internet? Defies belief it does.

Anyway, so now I'm going to tell you about the inane details of my job....
I'm trying to remember a time when I liked my elementary school class of 8 year olds. A time when I didn't get a shiver of fear down my back and break out in a cold sweat when I thought of teaching them. A time when I didn't believe they were sent straight from Valhalla every monday evening to torture me for the one hour a week in which I try in vain to learn them English. The other teacher has to come in and tell them to shut up in Italian sometimes. Last week 2 were whispering "scoreggia" (hadn't got a clue what it meant then) and I was ignoring them, then another heard and said it, then they got more bold and started shouting it, then they were all shouting "scoreggia", "scoreggia", so i was like,
"Stop saying scoreggia please guys" which was of course like throwing oil on a fire, cos they all pointed at me and went
"Waaa haaaa!! Katy say scoreggia!! Katy say scoreggia!! " and I was like:
"Stop it!! Stop saying scoreggia now!" and they were creased up on the floor cos i said it AGAIN, then I start giggling cos Giorgia is actually crying helplessly with hysterical laughter, and it was at this inopportune moment, just as I was laughing at them shouting "scoreggia Katy", that the other teacher chose to walk in and she demands that they stop shouting "fart" so loudly cos it's disturbing her class of upper-intermediate students who are trying to discuss the difference between the second and third conditional (didn't understand this last part of what she said, I think it's a quasi-Italian grammatical term, I've certainly never heard of it.)

It's also a nightmare trying to enforce rules, I made a naughty chair facing the wall, and when one of them was naughty I was gonna sit them in it and do something really fun, like, pictionary or miming, with the other kids (god, don't talk to me about bloody miming, I mimed rooms of the house, i.e. bedroom - mimed lying down on the bed, then kitchen - mimed doing the washing up, then living room - mimed watching TV, and what do i do for bathroom?? The obvious non inflammatory washing your face and armpits?? nope, didn't think of that did I? ... I mimed sitting on the toilet, which they found hilarious, and what ensued every time one of them got up to mime a room, was a competition to see who could do the loudest pooing noise, accompanied by strenuous pushing noises curtesty of the theatrical Lulia.) Anyway, so i tried to explain what the naughty chair was for, and they just didn't capisco, understandably, cos they can't speak english, so they got all confused bless 'em:
Me - "So, whoever's naughty sits on the naughty chair... capisco?"
Them - "Yes katy, I sit on chair??" (Natascia gets up to move to chair)
"No, not yet, you're nice now, if you're naughty you sit on the chair" looking at Angelo
"..Me? sit on chair??" (Angelo moves to sit on the chair)
"No! Not yet!! Not sit on chair now!! Example: if Giorgia is naughty she sits on the chair"
"Aaaah!! Capisco ...... Giorgia, sit on chair now" (Giorgia moves to sit on chair)
"Noooooo no, no, not giorgia sit on chair, only if she's naugty... oh never mind guys.. so, lets draw on the board some more"
"Yey!"